If you find it hard to sit and do nothing without feeling guilty, you’re not alone.
As someone who has experienced burnout and struggled with downtime and stillness in the past, I can definitely relate.
There’s a popular study where participants were given the choice of sitting alone with their thoughts or administering mild electric shocks to themselves.
The results? Yup, shockingly enough, they preferred electric shocks! Phew, this shows just how uncomfortable we can be with silence and solitude.
But how do you get good at doing nothing? Let’s take a look at slow living and the art of simply being…
Why Embrace Boredom?
Go ahead, get bored!
Why? Overstimulation, especially from screens, can actually dull our minds. Not to mention it wires us to want more and more external input. (hello, dopamine hits!)
But, when we get intentional about taking time out, our brains have a chance to recharge, refresh, and regain clarity.
Studies have shown that individuals who have even moderate levels of boredom are more likely to engage in creative thinking and problem-solving.
Ever wonder why those “shower thoughts” are so awesome? Well, it’s one of the rare moments when we’re truly alone, away from our devices, and our brains have the opportunity to spark new ideas.
The Power of Slow Living
In a world that values constant busyness and productivity, learning to slow down and savor moments of stillness can seem like a pipe dream!
I’m sure you’re reading this thinking, ‘yeah, right jules!’
I realize this can be a radical act of self-care, but even small steps can help us experience the beauty of the here and now, and find a deeper sense of gratitude and contentment.
So, here are a few reasons why you should start getting good at doing nothing… and embrace slow living….
1. You Stop Complaining
Complaining is easy. And second nature to many of us! But the truth is this:
Complaining doesn’t solve problems. Nope.
So, if you have the ability to change a situation, take action. If you can’t, try shifting your perspective.
For years, I would come home from work and download to my hubby all the drama, stories, and annoying people I had to deal with at work. (This wasn’t just a day once in a while; it had become my narrative.)
There is ongoing discussion online about a study by Stanford that suggests complaining diminishes the size of the hippocampus, a critical part of the brain involved in problem-solving and intelligent thinking. (i.e., makes us dumber)
While there may be a time and place to express your thoughts, such as through journaling, spiraling into a negative mindset does not lead to any progress or growth.
Plus, nobody wants to be around a Debbie-downer.
When we give ourselves more alone time, we have the chance to process our thoughts, find ways to comfort ourselves and better work through those negative thoughts.
Not to mention, we’re much less likely to erupt with complaints to those around us!
2. You Show, Don’t Tell
It’s easy to say that one day, we’ll slow down or that we will rest when we’re dead. Sure, that’s fun to say, but it’s no way to live.
But when we start prioritizing ourselves —we show ourselves and others that we mean it!
It’s not enough to talk about setting boundaries and making rest a priority. We’ve got to walk the talk and actually take action.
No one else is going to do it for us.
I remember telling my husband over and over that after just one more race, I’d finally take a break. But guess what? It never happened. I got too caught up in the excitement, the hustle, and the non-stop training.
We need to mean what we say, and say what we mean.
Bottom line: actions speak louder than words, my friends.
Are you living an authentic life? (Or hustling to keep up the show with everyone else?) Let me ask you this…
What can you say no to this week?
Where can you create margin in your life?
When was the last time you were alone?
3. You Stop Caring What Other People Think (And Say)
As we prioritize self-care and embrace moments of stillness, a beautiful sense of confidence starts to flow through our lives.
We begin to care less about what others think or say about us and can gradually detach from the constant noise of external voices.
Rather than trying to hide our flaws and boost our strengths to seek approval, we start owning and acknowledging our imperfections.
We no longer feel the need to consistently prove ourselves to the world.
So, don’t underestimate the importance of keeping quiet… a listener is a learner!
Side note: I’ve been working on being more present and in tune to others during conversations, and it’s eye-opening! I guess it’s because I no longer need to speak and receive as much external validation as before?
How To Start Doing Nothing
Sometimes we convince ourselves that everything is urgent and demands our immediate attention.
But, more often than not, that’s just our reactive (vs proactive) nature kicking in.
Trust me, I get it. Back when I was knee-deep in the tech marketing world, it felt like every task was an emergency.
My husband would often remind me that not everything was a matter of life or death. Sure, it used to annoy me at the time (let’s be honest!), but once I stepped away from that hustle, I knew he was right all along.
Don’t get me wrong, I realize there are people out there, like my friends in healthcare, who truly deal with life-and-death situations every single day.
But my press release hitting the wire at the perfect moment on a random Tuesday was not.
When we step back and begin to embrace a slower pace of life, something magical starts to happen within us.
So, how do you start doing nada?
- Start small: Begin by setting aside just a few minutes each day for stillness. Use this time to simply be present and let your mind wander without any specific purpose or task. It’s amazing how even a few minutes of quiet can make a difference.
- Disconnect and unplug: In our hyper-connected world, we’re constantly bombarded with notifications and distractions. Take intentional breaks from technology and create dedicated spaces for being offline.Go ahead and allow yourself to step away from the constant buzz of emails and social media.
- Give in to boredom: As I mentioned above, instead of trying to fill every moment of your day with activities and stimulation, allow yourself to be bored. Boredom can spark creativity and lead to deeper self-reflection. You might be surprised what comes to mind in the quiet…
- Practice mindfulness: Engage in activities that cultivate mindfulness, such as meditation, yoga, or even a simple walk in nature. These practices help you stay present and fully grounded in the current moment rather than getting caught up in worrying about the past or future.
- Prioritize self-care: This might seem like a no-brainer – but make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine. Pencil in time for any activity that nourishes and replenishes your mind, body, and soul.
The Wrap: How To Start Doing Nothing and Start Slow Living
Remember, it’s not about doing absolutely nothing all the time. It’s about finding balance and creating space in your life to hear your own thoughts and find peace among the chaos.
I’m cheering you on!
XO,
Jules
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