Lately, life has shifted into high gear. This season has challenged me to maintain my boundaries and keep my priorities in check. I’ve also gained more insight into why the hustle culture can feel so good — we all love to feel important and appreciated. (More on that later)
But it wasn’t until my health deteriorated that I finally understood the real cost of it all. Now, on the other side of chronic illness, I have a deeper appreciation for life’s rhythms and prioritize my well-being.
Don’t get me wrong – slow living isn’t easy and goes against the cultural grain. But I’m here to tell you that despite what’s happening in your life, you can slow down, too…
Let’s unpack this a little more…
The Allure of Busyness
First, why are we so busy? Simple. It’s the fear of missing out (FOMO).
Let me explain. People-pleasers like myself want to feel important, needed, and always in the mix. We take on more tasks, attend more meetings, and cease to exist beyond our productivity levels to be well-liked and well-respected.
When I was working in corporate marketing, I continued to take most of my calls and meetings while on vacation. I didn’t want to miss a beat or fall behind, and I hated the idea of being a bottleneck or slowing down progress.
But most of all, I just didn’t want to miss out. I loved being in the know and (feeling) in control.
I’m reading Dale Carnegie’s book How to Win Friends and Influence People, in which he outlines how our social interactions are fundamentally driven by two needs:
The need to feel important and the need to feel appreciated.
Think about it… this applies to almost every situation and relationship in our lives, right? Let me ask you this: Are you seeking too much importance and appreciation from your work life?
“Work invades the places you let it” is often said, reminding us that work-life balance is ours to define—if only we dare to set boundaries. I’m not saying it’s easy; it takes courage and consistency to set limits.
Bottom line: No boundaries = no peace.
Busy or Productive? Slowing Down to Speed Up
It’s easy to confuse a jam-packed schedule with being productive. I used to spend my days jumping from call to call and pounding out emails into the wee hours. While I honestly did feel like I was working hard… was I productive?
Nope, not really.
You may have heard of the “swallow the frog” concept. It refers to tackling the most daunting task on your to-do list right at the start of your day. By doing it first, you essentially ‘swallow the frog,’ and everything else seems easier by comparison. While I don’t always follow this rule, it makes a HUGE difference when I do, and highly recommend it!
Instead of diving into your day with email and social media, which dictate your actions and energy, why not start with journaling or quiet time?
When your head is clear, try writing down the three most important tasks you need to complete, and let that guide you for the rest of the day.
As the day progresses, continue to take one thing at a time. Numerous studies reiterate that we can’t multitask—the cognitive load is too much. Even if you think you kick butt at juggling a million things, sorry – you can’t (at least not well).
Bottom line: Choose one thing and do it well, then move on.
Your Values Set Your Priorities
I’ve learned that life should be filled with energy givers rather than takers. But how do we ensure we are on the path that lights us up, not wears us down?
It starts with defining our personal values.
I did a values assessment in therapy a couple of years ago and found that my values didn’t align with my life. (Wake up call!)
If you’re interested, here’s my list:
- God (Spirituality)
- Marriage (Paul)
- Health (Healing/Well-being)
- Relationships (Friends & Family)
- Work (Freelance/Consult)
- Hobbies (Run, Write)
Reconnecting with my core values helps create alignment and sets the stage for a life that nurtures me physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
A couple of weeks ago, our Pastor got me thinking. He asked us to really look into our lives and answer this question—are we just saying we’ve put God at the center, or are we living like it? Saying we follow God is simple, but the real test is in the day-to-day, in how we actually live it out.
Slowing down to carefully align our choices with our values is a powerful step toward connecting with our authentic selves.
Bottom line: Understand your personal values, the rest will fall into place 🙂
How Getting Organized Helps Us Slow Down and Focus
So, how do you know if you’re living according to your values and priorities? For me, it started with getting organized – I wanted to see exactly where my time was going and what was getting the bulk of my energy.
Like most of you, email and social media were my biggest time sucks, so let’s start there.
I set specific times of the day to check emails. This means not just flagging or leaving messages unread for later. It’s about being ready to respond then and there because, let me tell you, those unread emails do weigh on your mind, piling up mental clutter until you finally get around to dealing with them.
I’ve also turned off my email alerts. As an ADD kid, I must reduce interruptions to stay focused and on task throughout the day.
When I do check my emails, I have a bunch of newsletters or items to ‘read later’—which I snooze to late afternoon. This strategy keeps my inbox—and my mind—much less cluttered, letting me focus on the more important tasks during my highest energy levels early in the day.
Social Media
I limit checking social media to about once a day, and sometimes, I closer to just 3-4 times a week.
And here’s the kicker: I do most of my scrolling sessions while I’m on the elliptical at the gym. Weird?
Maybe.
But this way, I’m not just planted on the couch, losing time to the scroll. There’s an automatic cutoff, too—once my 45-minute workout is up, so is my social media time.
Oh, and the best part? By not being on socials all the time, the algorithm practically hand-delivers the top posts I’m interested in seeing (with much less mindless scrolling!)
Decluttering
Next up, I tackled the clutter and excess stuff crowding my life. You wouldn’t believe how much of a time-suck it was just searching and sifting through things every single day.
Seriously, the minutes really start to stack up! Think about it—how often have you wasted time hunting down that one coffee mug that somehow makes your morning brew taste just right? Or the daily treasure hunt in your closet for an outfit that not only fits perfectly but also hits that sweet spot of comfort and style?
Don’t even get me started on the chaos of navigating through a packed pantry or an overstuffed medicine cabinet.
But here’s the thing: cutting down on clutter doesn’t just give back precious minutes to your day, it also works wonders for your mental state.
Bottom line: There’s time in the day if you know where to look…
Busy, Stressed & Unhealthy (It doesn’t have to be that way)
The pressure to remain constantly engaged and always ‘on’ takes a toll. And look, frankly, this wreaks havoc on our mental and physical health— to say the least!
Being in a chronically heightened state can lead to everything from sleep disturbances and anxiety to physical ailments like headaches and fatigue—clear signs that something’s got to give.
When your body whispers, pay attention so you don’t have to hear it scream.
The good news? Shifting away from this non-stop mode is possible.
Starting small, like setting boundaries for work hours, dedicating time to unwind without screens, and prioritizing activities that nourish rather than deplete your energy, can make a massive difference.
For me, slowing down proved to be an unexpected accelerant to a healthier, more balanced, and ultimately more productive life. But it wasn’t without a lot of work and intentional actions.
The Wrap: Combating Busyness & Slow Living
I’m still not sure why we still buy into the myth that rest is for the weak and brag about our endless to-dos, but that’s the world we live in.
Ask yourself this week …
Should you be on that call?
Go to that event?
Sign up for that volunteer gig?
Maybe? Maybe not?
At the end of the day, we’re all wired differently, and slowing down can look different for each of us. But remember, true progress and fulfillment usually come from deliberate pauses and thoughtful reflection, not running from calendar block to calendar block…
I’m cheering you on!
XO,
Jules
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